Sunday, April 15, 2007

The Most Ridiculous Items of the Day...ala Fox News

Everyday is full of ridiculous things...especially in Happy Valley...Especially here. I found that some days need a little nudge to make sure that there is some active entertainment so as to not go crazy with boredom in Provo, hence the frog legs in the last post. So, for this little segment on The Late Blog, I decided to tell a story about Jesse and I's little run in the fine men and women in blue of the Provo PoPo Department.

To make a short story shorter, we went to Wal-Mart and happened to walk by a sweet little 25 dollar paintball gun. Jesse had to buy it, and I had to laugh. The thing is, Boredom+Paintball=Bad Idea. Especially in freakin Provo. So we drove by some friends' houses and shot up their windows... One group of particularly unhappy neighbors decided to chase us and since we were in a cousin's Audi, they didn't know who we were. So we wound through Provo neighborhoods (at the speed limit of course) and lost them a few times. In frustration, they called the police and the whole force showed up. We pulled over before they turned their lights and sirens on (because we are amazing citizens and believe in civic responsibility). We showed them the gun and they made us get out of the car and sit on the curb while the four cop cars and the 6 cops stood around, doing nothing. The main cop was way cool and said that everyone showed up cause they have absolutely nothin to do. Then he called our neighbors who we paintballed and told them we did it cause we thought they were fat and ugly. I was havin a good time on that curb, no lie. So they let us off, which was a miracle cause if they would've found Jesse's loaded .40 under the seat that fool would've been screwed! He doesn't have the license for his piece yet... So as they were giving all our ID's and stuff back, good ol Tommy Sorensen and our buddy Eric drove by and saw us in our predicament. Anyway, all we had to do was clean up their windows (which all the cops followed us over to the house to watch us do) and I decided that since we home teach them, that counted as our visit. Not bad, we got it done early in the month! Ridiculous.

I just had a run in with the head of the Physics Department at BYU. He was guest-lecturing in our class and decided to bring up the idea of human-caused global warming, and defend it! Bad idea for him. I let him speak for a bit, then the gloves came off. I let him have it. He tried to defend his stance and asked what I knew about it, and so I unloaded the things and interviews I've studied, and stated one report that contradicted the slide that he had up on the screen and backed it up with an IPCC report I just read. I then asked him a few questions that he couldn't answer and then he stated that he really was just beginning to learn about global warming and had only read one book on the subject. He then thanked me for studying and said that's what his point was, to encourage us to find out and search for ourselves about the world around us. I bet. Ridiculous.

Now, there are many ridiculous items, too many to mention, especially in Utah. It would be impossible to name them all. Sometimes you just have to appreciate the ones you can remember and watch the O'Reilly Factor for the rest. I'll be honest, I don't watch that show too much cause Sportcenter is on at the same time, but he's got the idea. Well, big gulps eh? See ya later.

65 comments:

R. A. L. III. said...

dont bring that gun to Huntington Beach..i dont think the police are as nice there!

Alli Fantastico said...

haha whaaaaaat? I love how our family is like a super awesome episode of cops, sans mullets (pronounced "muh-LAYS")
...or do you have a mullet now? I haven't see yer chops in a while.

Mandy said...

thats one awesome story!

-KJ said...

I am not sure what to say here. Lucky you that you didn't get a d--- cop. Funny story. Jesse on the other hand is going to get his A thown in jail. I HATE that he has that freakin gun. That said, way to smoke that "Head" of the Physics Dept. guy!!! Encourage you to study? Whatevaah!
Is Provo like Reno 911? That would be a sweet show. . . Provo 911! 60 cops show up for a J walker!

Lyd said...

Those girls are lame. If some guys would have done that to us (my roomies and I,) we would have just gotten them back. That's the way it works isn't it?! Funny crap though. And Jesse is a retard.

R. A. L. III. said...

Gees dont you all know how scary it is out in the hood of provo! Jesse has to carry a gun. All those metro guys out there could slap him or something!

Eliza said...

Provo smovo!...Try getting searched by LVPD on your way home from a church dance on Jones Blvd with Darin Hadley and Ryan Banda. while everyone leaving the dance is watching you with your hand on the hood of a cop car! Not like I'd know or anything. Or getting surrounded by 6 cop cars and 1 cop Heli....I wouldn't know about that either.

R. A. L. III. said...

That sucks! I got pulled over rite in front of the chapel on the way to pick up people for our ward Temple day once. But magically the ticket didn’t show up in the system when I had my attorney show up to handle it. Some times it pays to do rite!! lol

-KJ said...

What were you doing with those two guys anyway? Ehhh? I am not sure I believe they used to go to church dances. I thought they were so hawt when I was little. Lucky you. ;)

Cortney said...

Ha ha!!! What were those people thinking??? I'm just gald that you guys didnt call the cops on us when we walked into your house with nylons over our faces. Even better Im glas Jesse didnt have his gun at that time.

Eliza said...

We did stuff with them all the time...that is the only time Ryan was sober! We were helping out a brah. (as Dog would say)

Cortney said...

And just make sure that if you guys ever get bored again just stay clear of our house.

Ryan Nelson said...

We shot your house that night too. One of your roomies must have cleaned it up...or its still there!

Ash-ah-leee! said...

okay alli!!! I totally pronounced it muh-LAYS even before I read your comment on it!

I just love this family!!! We rock!!! Cops and stumping professors!!!...oh and slurpees and disneyland...

there it's out there for discussion!

-KJ said...

I talked to Jennifer Banda a couple years ago, and I asked her about her family. She was talking about how everyone was doing so well. It sounded like this. Ryan is divorced and has a couple kids but he doing better. Janelle is out of rehab and trying to get her kids back. Ryan has a baby and his ex is pregnant again but they are trying to work it out. Tiffany is still at home with my parents with her two kids...everyone is doing great!
It went something like that. I was sorry I asked.

liufamily said...

Ryan,I am so proud!!!! I mean about the whole prof. thing!!! So were you enjoyin that moment, or are you used to winning all arguments by now? I'm glad I didn't get pulled over when I was moving Lances loaded shotgun in my minivan, that would have really sucked, and I didn't know it was loaded until Lance asked if I had unloaded it before I moved it,whoops!!!!! We live in North town, thats my excuse!! But in Provo? Whats Jesse's?

liufamily said...

Oh! Jennifer Banda got divorced too!

Eliza said...

Yeah that sound about right. Sad to say. My mom saw Ryan right after he got divorced and he asked her if I was married and followed that up with, "is she happily married?". Sad...I guess we now know what happens to children who's parents sell amway. (just a joke, but I shouldn't really joke) Hi stacey btw...I said hi to you on your blog but I never saw a response so I figured you either didn't know who I was anymore or you are mad that I snooped on your blog. HAH HEE!

-KJ said...

I laughed at the amway joke. I also remember Bro. Banda (I don't remember his name) reading a book about getting rich quick. :( I was in grade school and remember thinking that was weird.

Cortney said...

Yea now that I think of it my roommate was cleaning stuff off of our window. Thats it this is war!!!

Brock & Veronica Nelson said...

freak yes my cuz is the best! not only do you defy the lame provo police department that does nothing but give traffic tickets, but to stick it to the global warming because of human factors guest speaker of physics is absolutely incredible! ha ha ha ha haaaa! ha and another ha!

-KJ said...

If we could all think as fast on our feet as Ryan does! When I get flustered I just look like an idiot. Ry always stays so calm and knows exactly what to say. I am always rehearsing what I would have said after all is said and done. It is probably good I don't think that way. I would get myself into trouble. I do already!!!

Lyd said...

Same way. And I hate it. What ever Kissy, you always have something good to say! I wish that I could be on my toes reguarding commenting (face to face.) I always think of the good stuff after the convo is said and done! Dang it! I think that is one of the reasons why I'm quiet. I'm trying to think of something good to say while the convo is going, so then I miss my chance! Piece of crap.

Eliza said...

You just got to say it Lyd. Biting your tongue is a good thing though so I wouldn't be too worried about it. I've said many a things I wish I hadn't.

-KJ said...

Amen.

Lyd said...

No, I have nothing to bit my tongue over. I think of what I want to say after the subject is over, so it would just make me look stupid.

Eliza said...

Just bite your tongue anyway and pretend! You'll look cool at least!

Ash-ah-leee! said...

if biting your tongue is the coolest, then i'm Miles Davis!!!

Eliza said...

I think I might change Miles' name to that (curtis still likes Maxwell and I do to but Miles Davis just sounds so good obviously) .....we get one free shot and then after that you have to pay or go to court or something like that. Or I could always save Davis for the next boy... WHAT?!?!? I must be smokin' the crack cocaine.

-KJ said...

You are smokin crack. You're having a girl next!

Eliza said...

WHAT was for I'm not having any more kids! THAT is why I am smoking the crack cocaine!

-KJ said...

I totally thought you were going for 5! I swear your mom said that.

Eliza said...

ARE YOU ALIVE?

-KJ said...

He just got back from Vegas and then had finals. He doesn't care about our needs.

Eliza said...

Rude!

liufamily said...

Hi Liza, im sorry for not sayin hi! So I need to tell you that a lady in my ward said that after 5 kids, its easy to have 10! And you are welcome to snoop any time, its fun to see how every one is doin!

Ryan Nelson said...

Here's some trivia for you... In what buiding at Disneyland is/was Walt Disney's private apartment located??? First one wins...

-KJ said...

Small World? There can't be too many choices because there weren't that many big rides then. If I win, what do I get. I am pretty sure I am wrong!!!

Eliza said...

above the firestation He also had one where the gallery is.

Mandy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mandy said...

taylor says it was above the firehouse which is now the pharmacy on main street

Eliza said...

I don't think it is a pharmacy below. The apartment is the second floor above the Fire station and the lower level is where I think they store the fire truck. There was a Pharmacy on Main Street but it is now The Watch Shop.

http://www.justdisney.com/images/Disneyland/Apartment.GIF

Walt and Roy had one over in New Orleans Square.

Lyd said...

The one that I think that he is talking about is the one above the Firehouse. It's where the candle is burning in the window.

-KJ said...

Geeks.

Eliza said...

you just need to learn how to use Google KJ. We're smart!

-KJ said...

I guess I just thought you guys knew it all and could pull that stuff out of your head on demand!

Eliza said...

you wanted to say out of your butt didn't you?

Lyd said...

Hey, no Google here! That came out of my head! (or butt if would like that better.)

Eliza said...

(lyd don't blow my cover)

Ryan Nelson said...

You guys knowing all this Disney trivia is the most ridiculous item of the day... fo sho

Eliza said...

knowing disney trivia does no harm but a paintball gun....come on now , that is what's ridiculous!

Taylor Oblad said...

BORING!!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Eliza said...

you need a new post buddy!

Taylor Oblad said...

Yeah but I have an excuse i.e., go to school for a billion hours, spend time with the kids, then the wife. When are you graduating? I would love to see that happen before Eric. Now do it!!!

-KJ said...

Oh snap!

Eliza said...

I was telling Ryan to do a new post not you tay.

-KJ said...

Ry is too busy getting mono.

-KJ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
-KJ said...

So, do you ever wear your N.C.M.O shirt when you make out?

Eliza said...

Do you really have mono?

-KJ said...

No!!! He is just kind of a man whore. Just kidding Ry!

Brock & Veronica Nelson said...

holy comments batman! 60?!!! after a previous 100 comment breaker too, impressive....hey i got an idear, how bout somethin new? here i'll give ya a topic...the new "full throttle" slurpee, not only justa great frozen beverage but now loaded with caffeine, oh imagine the possibilities!

Lyd said...

Oooh! I like the Full Throttle Slurpee!!! First is Coke and then this next! yumminess.

Lyd said...

And yes! A new freakin' post! NOW!!

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