Wednesday, March 21, 2007

I'm Not Finished Yet....!!!

So, anyone who knows me knows that I wasn't the most "careful" kid when I was growing up. I found a certain amount of joy riding in the car on the way to the hospital to get stitched up by my favorite nurses. I never really understood why you needed to look before you leaped cause clearly leaping is so much fun and looking wastes so much recess time. Maybe thats why I have big calves too, don't know. But apparently I wised up and haven't done any self-inflicted cranial damage in quite sometime. Whelll, yesterday I finally got sick and tired of not having any fresh face damage and decided that a metal rigid steel grinding brush would be the perfect thing to re-live all those good times and have some fun!! Boy oh boy did I have some fun, who needs Disneyland when you can do this...
Ya, I know, doesn't get much more fun than that. Luckily, the grinder flew back at my face at about mach-8 so it hit so hard it numbed me right up. After a quick "s" bomb and a quick check to make sure all my teeth were still in my head and that my eyes were still working (my protective glasses were thrown about 15 feet off my hizead), I finally got to laugh, just like the good ol days. The best part was that so many people got to laugh with me. Eric, who was standing right by me in fact, was so stoked about my return to childhood that instead of asking if I was ok and if he could help, said, "Hey, wait right there, and don't wipe the blood off! I got to get the camera so we can get this on tape!" That's what big bros are fo. I'll post the tape as soon as we get it downloaded, so all can enjoy. I know the people at Home Depot sure enjoyed looking at my oozing face complete with 40+ half circle cuts. I saw one little boy look at me with such jealousy due to the fun I obviously had the his mouth dropped open and he ran to his older brother and said. "Did you see his face! Wow! What did he do?!" One day he'll catch the vision of what having a good time is all about...I'm just glad I was there to start that boy's desire to go have his own fun. Anyway, moral of the story, grinding steel can be a good time, especially since you won't have to shave and BYU can't argue with you about it. Haaaaa! Latea crackas.

61 comments:

Sarah said...

Ryan, were you just feeling left out because Olivia was getting all the attention for her accident?? There are other ways to deal with jealousy.

Lyd said...

Nice one Sarah! Man! I wish that could happen to me. All I got was a broken blood vessel in my finger from smashing it into a wall playing wallyball for FHE! Dang it! May be some other day I'll get a good one.

Alli Easley said...

That Ryan, he's so hot right now.

Cortney said...

Man! You really did it this time. Hopefully you wont have any scars from it. If you do let me know and I can get you the hookups.

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

I was feeling a little left out! But they way I see it, I'm trying to keep a constant scarring going on so that I never run out of sweet stories to tell. And what kind of hook ups are you talkin about???

Mary Stuart said...

Some of the best conversation starters are about scars. You should make up some really far fetched story when people start asking you what happened.

liufamily said...

Maybe you should invest in more than safety goggles.

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

Like what? A safety grinding blade or a safety face mask... How bout a safety mascot so before I did something stupid he could cheer me on to safety. Haha, ok, sarcasm aside, you're probably right Stacey.

Lyd said...

I want to see Eric make a safety face mask. He could make a freakin' awesome one.

-KJ said...

Hey Ry, you got something on your chin. Need a napkin?

Ashley O said...

ewwww a napkin??? imagine sticking that on your face to slow the bleeding down and then the blood dries so when you pull it off your face it pulls the 'scabs' off too and it starts gushing again!!!! yuck

so i just pictured the scene from The Princess Bride when Wes is in the Pit of Dispair...when the albino scary man was dabbing his mangled shoulder....remember that noise? it sounds like a cat eating macaroni and cheese.... I HATE IT!!!! I all know you know what I'm talkin'bout!!!

R. A. L. III. said...

hmmm??? ummmm??? way to go budddy???? or Sorry???

Lyd said...

Yes, I can picture that very clearly in my mind. I was watching this movie a couple of nights ago, some of you older peeps might remember this one, Teen Witch, and there was this kid on there that looked like that guy, just younger and not an albino! I'm sorry for the kid.

Cortney said...

I'm just saying since your not married you might want to keep that face looking good and scar free. So if it heals and you have a nasty scar I can help you out. That is what I specialize in. But if you like the scar look then bravo!

-KJ said...

I thought it was "stirring macaroni and cheese" sound. Either way, gross.

Ashley O said...

well yes it is stirring mac and cheese but if you were with Taylor, Mandy, and me you would get the joke (if those peeps even remember).... forever ago tay and mandy were fighting over if it was stirring macaroni and cheese or a cat eating... I jumped in and said what about a cat eating macaroni and cheese! Plus, that just puts a cool image in your head if you think about it that way!

Stephanie King said...

Hey Ryan I'm supposed to ask you if I can be a part of the wet bandits? I have no idea what that means.

Cortney said...

Oops! I was signed in as Stephanie. Ok so let's try this again. I'm supposed to ask you if I can be a part of the wet bandits?

-KJ said...

Is Stephanie your alter ego?

Eliza said...

I once thought I went blind when I blew all the fuses in my apt when I was shocked by the 220 plug for my dryer. Funny story...I'll tell at the next family party.

Ashley O said...

hahaha liza that is a great story!!! hahaha!

Lyd said...

Hey, I learned why people shake when they are getting electrocuted. Kinda interesting...not really.

-KJ said...

It couldn't be from the massive amounts of electricity passing through their bodies, could it?

-KJ said...

Remember those pics Uncle Rich took of that guy who got fried from electricity? You could see his shadow burned into the ground from the flash of light, also his skin melted to the concrete. Nasty.

Ashley O said...

thanks for the imagery kissy!!! i think i'll skip lunch today!

Eliza said...

I never saw that picture!

Lyd said...

Not only is the freakin' electricity, but lights and outlets flicker/pulsate 60 times a second, hence the shaking. And yes, I do remember those pictures. It reminds me of a story I read in middle/high school about this family's shadows being blasted onto their house from an a-bomb or something being set off. I want that to happen to me. How cool whould that be!

Eliza said...

I can make an alien shadow while on the trampoline...all you do is stand with your back to the sun and face a block wall. then put both of your hands on your head like you are being searched and there you have it - a one-eyed alien...OH and you can blink too if you take a bow. ( the trampoline I guess isn't too necessary but that is usually when I make the alien shadow)

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

You can pretty much do that anywhere you have a shadow and some sort of wall device right? I mean, do you have to be on a trampoline in order to enjoy a good alien shodow impersonation? And I used those pics of Richard's in my electrical class and scared the shiz out of some kids. It was awesome.

Ashley O said...

hahaha Liza we can use the trampoline that is in the driveway at home! I can't believe dad saved that...oh wait...NO YES I CAN BELIEVE IT!!!

Alli Easley said...

I used to kill myself on the Nelson/Nelson trampoline every Sunday. Too bad I loved double bouncing all the little people til their knees busted out. Man, I was such of a sweetpea.

-KJ said...

yackumm!

-KJ said...

That was the sound someone makes being double bounced, just so you know.

KABSorensen said...

Hey! What happened to Taylor? He hasn't commented in awhile and I was sure he had something funny to say about Ryan's face. He must really be study!

-KJ said...

Poor Tay! Poorer Mandy!

Ashley O said...

poor ryan's face!!!

Lyd said...

No, Tay put up like three new posts this week, or something like that. He just hates Ry now because he wishes that he could have a face like that.

R. A. L. III. said...

Hello my PDJ brother! Well I will be up there tonight! I am leaving later than I had planed today because I am now bringing some friends from my ward. But we are still on for Priesthood and are biannual conference diner Saturday night! Oh and after seeing your pictures I had to get a good scar going to so I hit my self in the forehead with a wrench while working on my truck and split my head open for about an inch or so. That way you won’t fee self conscience at conference.

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

Self conscious?? Heck no cracka, these are pride scars. You know what Seal looks like right?? Well that fool got married to one of the hottest girls ever, so I figure once I get a few more scars I'll find my wife.

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

As for Taylor, he has a certain amount of "funniness" or "wit" in his system each month and he depleted his ration for March quite early. It's all about pacing yourself and Tay will be back up to speed in a few days. Just watch.

Alli Easley said...

It runs in the family.

R. A. L. III. said...

well man i didnt know that was the plan! I me so excited about my new scar!!!

Mandy said...

taylor has not depleted his funniness this month, believe me i live with him! he is trying hard to not get sucked in to blogging right now with finals coming up. i feel bad for him cuz i know he wants to be all over your blog so bad...just wait until the end of april...hell be all over everyones blog

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

Clearly he's not depleated. Our family does not "depleat" our humor. Our pants may depleat from time to time so that we don't have those nice lines in our slacks, but that just means we need new pants or at least need them to be pressed. But as far as being funny, you're right, we're always pretty damn funny.

Mandy said...

yea your guys whole family is funny. sometimes i feel like a dud at family functions...im not as witty and i dont remember every single snl skit like all of you! i love it though, there is never a dull moment with the oblad/christensen/nelson family!

Lyd said...

And don't forget the Kingham's! Oh, and don't you worry about it Mandy. I'm not that funny, I mostly just say stupid comments.

Mandy said...

i knew i forgot someone!! thanks lyd!

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

I think everyone is pretty dang funny. Some people just hog more of the speaking time so they may "seem" more funny, but their just hoggers. I don't think there is a way to distribute equal comedic time though, except for commercials, and I hate commercials.

-KJ said...

You have to be aggressive to talk in our family. If you are a Nelson you just have to talk till your hands/arms get tired ;)!

Ashley O said...

yup i talk with the hands too!!! EVERYONE not in the family makes fun of me!!! The best one I do I was telling a friend why i use a fork AND knife to eat my cafe rio salad...its so the dressing gets incorporated, the lettuce gets reduced in size and the ingredients marry!!! But I was doing the motion of cutting with a fork and knife really big while I said it!!! back and forth arm movements!!! Yes he made fun big time..


BUT GUESS WHO IS NOW USING A KNIFE AND FORK TO EAT THERE CAFE RIO SALAD!!!? "yeah lance that's what I thought!!!!" I says!!!

Mandy said...

hey ryan isnt it about time for a new post???

Eliza said...

I second that mandy

Lyd said...

I can't say jack about an update, so I'm not gunna say nothin'. I'll have somethin' by Friday afternoon because I have a butt load of projects for my finals the rest of this week. Hopfully I'll have some good crap.

-KJ said...

yea! What happened to the Frog Legs post that you were going to do?!! Lets see it!

Lyd said...

Frog Legs?

-KJ said...

Or pics of the demolition project in your appt!

Ashley O said...

anything

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

K! I'm sorry. I've been writing papers and trying to get caught up with school and all that crap. I promise to get a new one up today.

Ryan & Lauren Nelson said...

Do you want frog legs or demo?

Eliza said...

how bout the demo OF frog legs!

Eliza said...

when are we gonna see a pic of the healed face?